down memory lane and see some of the singers 10yrs+ back.....
范曉萱(Mavis Fan) 自言自語
This is a super classic MTV. He nvr changed much since the 80s =.=...
Another classic MTV... i wonder last time why i like him so much LOL now think back i wana laugh... his chinese really one of a kind!!
This 1 shld be around the early 90s i think. It used to be my fav when i started buying his albums.
I cant stop laughing while watching this. The starting of the mtv alrdy so biang, then see his hair lagi biang LOL!!
Handsome guy...
Our very own Superstar judge....
Ok have to stop here, Youtube is throwing tantrums at me alrdy. Loading so slow now...
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Friday, October 26, 2007
Going Bonkers soon.....
Sian to the max... recently assignment so little, anime also watch until nothing to watch liao, worse thing is no new games to play!!!!! What to do to kill time now? With all these free time i'm having now, my mind tends to wonder alot, its so hard to stop it from wondering around thinking of the past.
Damn it, i feel so lost in directions of my life once i'm not busy with work. Everyday doing the same thing over and over again makes me feel like i'm a robot. Nothing interesting has happened to me.
Hope for something to happen soon now, myb house on fire or a robbery or myb a break in, anything exciting will do..... just hope ba....
Damn it, i feel so lost in directions of my life once i'm not busy with work. Everyday doing the same thing over and over again makes me feel like i'm a robot. Nothing interesting has happened to me.
Hope for something to happen soon now, myb house on fire or a robbery or myb a break in, anything exciting will do..... just hope ba....
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Cruel rainy days........
These few nights have been very bad for me cos its always raining heavily outside in the middle of the night while i'm rushing my stuffs. The rain drops damn noisy until i cant even concentrate on what i'm doing.Surprisingly i duno why, whenever it rains theres always a pain in my chest. Aver very sharp pain that lasts for about 5-10 mins. Wonder what could be wrong with me.... hope its some terminal disease so i can leave this world soon.
Finally see the fruits of my hard work coming in now. And i've been saving them up.Initially those money were to help somebody with her debts 1, but then since that somebody had stepped on my tail, i guess these money i can happily keep for myself le. Was thinking of going on a trip this yr end to somewhere far far away. The 1st place that came to my mind was to go Europe to relax myself, but for some unknown reasons, my mind kept telling me to go Paris and see the Eiffiel Tower for myself. Going there alone seems no fun. How nice would it be if this yr is 2006 instead of 2007, at least with another month's hard work i might be able to bring somebody else along with me for a week's tour there, but things have to turn out this way. Well i guess its just too bad.
Seriously the stupid weather really know how to choose time to rain, now when i got so much free time theres no rain, i was hoping it'd rain tonite so i can have a good slp, but hey, its just some bad luck i guess. I'm kinda used to having bad luck now. Ever since that fateful day, my luck hasnt been good.... my migrain came back suddenly and i get attacks from it everyday at least once. No point consulting a doc for this, they'll only give u more panadols to take.... Go TPY central walk walk on a sunny day, just reach the central, start to rain heavily... doing some work in the middle of the day, suddenly power trip and i have to restart the whole thing again.... bathing time forgot the heater is spoilt, on heater and got myself scalded... sleep in the morning around 7am and got woken up by brats downstairs fixing their bikes at 9am... at least on top of this i dun get and debt collectors calling me alrdy. I wonder if this bad luck will be with me for a long time, if it really does, then i'll have to prepare myself for the worse scenerio. Shall i start an insurance plan now? LOL i bet if louis knows i have this thinking he'll come to me with his sales talk =p
My mum will be leaving for taiwan very soon for a week, so i guess it'll only be me, myself and I for that week in this house. I'll definately feel lonely, for the past month at least i still have my mum to accompany me so i dont feel that lonely, but the coming trip of hers..... haiz duno how am i going to cope with the loneliness. Hope by then my mind wun be running wild. What could be worse than being lonely? I know, many ppl will say "No money" , but have u given a though abt this "so what if u have money but u r lonely?" I dun club, i dun drink, recently i dislike the thought of going out... so what am i suppose to do at home? PCC until die ah LOL.
Just now when i really got nth to do, i went back to visit my Hi5 account, sure does bring back lotsa memories, ahh those honeymoon days, so sweet... was smiling at the monitor while reading those testi she wrote for me at that time. Too bad all those r nth but lies LOL. ALL LIES!!!! So stupid of me to have believed those stuffs. _|_=.=_|_ 2 fingers up for those lies!!!
The hatrad in me is slowly subsiding, it could be due to the reason that i've not spoken to her for quite some time. Think this shld really be the best way for the both of us. Women..... they're such a mysterious living thing to men....when u're with them u find them a pain in the ass, but when they leave u, u start thinking of them. I wonder what kinda of witchery is that. Gonna stop writing now, go to youtube watch MTVs. Cya
Finally see the fruits of my hard work coming in now. And i've been saving them up.Initially those money were to help somebody with her debts 1, but then since that somebody had stepped on my tail, i guess these money i can happily keep for myself le. Was thinking of going on a trip this yr end to somewhere far far away. The 1st place that came to my mind was to go Europe to relax myself, but for some unknown reasons, my mind kept telling me to go Paris and see the Eiffiel Tower for myself. Going there alone seems no fun. How nice would it be if this yr is 2006 instead of 2007, at least with another month's hard work i might be able to bring somebody else along with me for a week's tour there, but things have to turn out this way. Well i guess its just too bad.
Seriously the stupid weather really know how to choose time to rain, now when i got so much free time theres no rain, i was hoping it'd rain tonite so i can have a good slp, but hey, its just some bad luck i guess. I'm kinda used to having bad luck now. Ever since that fateful day, my luck hasnt been good.... my migrain came back suddenly and i get attacks from it everyday at least once. No point consulting a doc for this, they'll only give u more panadols to take.... Go TPY central walk walk on a sunny day, just reach the central, start to rain heavily... doing some work in the middle of the day, suddenly power trip and i have to restart the whole thing again.... bathing time forgot the heater is spoilt, on heater and got myself scalded... sleep in the morning around 7am and got woken up by brats downstairs fixing their bikes at 9am... at least on top of this i dun get and debt collectors calling me alrdy. I wonder if this bad luck will be with me for a long time, if it really does, then i'll have to prepare myself for the worse scenerio. Shall i start an insurance plan now? LOL i bet if louis knows i have this thinking he'll come to me with his sales talk =p
My mum will be leaving for taiwan very soon for a week, so i guess it'll only be me, myself and I for that week in this house. I'll definately feel lonely, for the past month at least i still have my mum to accompany me so i dont feel that lonely, but the coming trip of hers..... haiz duno how am i going to cope with the loneliness. Hope by then my mind wun be running wild. What could be worse than being lonely? I know, many ppl will say "No money" , but have u given a though abt this "so what if u have money but u r lonely?" I dun club, i dun drink, recently i dislike the thought of going out... so what am i suppose to do at home? PCC until die ah LOL.
Just now when i really got nth to do, i went back to visit my Hi5 account, sure does bring back lotsa memories, ahh those honeymoon days, so sweet... was smiling at the monitor while reading those testi she wrote for me at that time. Too bad all those r nth but lies LOL. ALL LIES!!!! So stupid of me to have believed those stuffs. _|_=.=_|_ 2 fingers up for those lies!!!
The hatrad in me is slowly subsiding, it could be due to the reason that i've not spoken to her for quite some time. Think this shld really be the best way for the both of us. Women..... they're such a mysterious living thing to men....when u're with them u find them a pain in the ass, but when they leave u, u start thinking of them. I wonder what kinda of witchery is that. Gonna stop writing now, go to youtube watch MTVs. Cya
Sunday, October 21, 2007
Damn who needs 蔡依林 when we have her!
Seriously I've noticed this girl way b4 蔡依林 became popular. I think Jolin is just another replica or wannabe of this girl. Don't believe? Look at the vids. ( Loading might take some time to laod cos youtube is always crowded )Sweet voice, pretty face, hot body. What else can u ask for in a female artist? Could probably be 1 of the most perfect female artist ever. Whats more, i seldom hear of her 绯闻. Dont think she has any ba.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Something else b4 i forget....Section only meant specially for the biatch
I bet she removed me from friendster, MSN and even changed her blog site LOL, y do i say that? I just checked my email b4 going to slp and when i was checking my friend updates on friendster i found out i wasnt dierectly linked to her anymore, nice remove there biatch, MSN? so long didnt see her online too, for her pattern, its impossible that she wont bring her lappy to a nearby Mac to use, i purposely left my msn on for so long just to monitor this, and yup, shes not online all these while. Her blog site no more updates for so long, not even horoscope updates LOL cfm change site liao.
Confirm she buay tahan the way i keep suaning her during our last conversation on MSN until she have to do all this. Eh seriously biatch, if u have to do all this to avoid me, u're not worth any of my time to torture. Theres no kick torturing some1 mentally when all she knows what to do is to avoid here and there. Such a weakling who doesnt know how to fight back.
Oh i forgot to mention in my earlier blog that i actually saw her when i was at shing siong after buying all the food. Wow u are so god damn lucky that the rest of them are not around, if not u confirm duno where to hide ur face. Eh biatch, if u're gonna avoid me and not let me torture u mentally anymore, i think i'll have to get u to speed up the paper process. If u're not going to do it fast, i'll just go approach any lawyer myself to get the papers done and u'll have to be paying for whatever costs the lawyer charges. I'll be giving u only up to this month end to do this shit, but if u let me continue to torture u mentally, i might change my mind and let u delay until ur bonus. Think about it biatch, and remember this, i'm not some1 who can be easily be toyed around with. Don't u dare mess with me.
Confirm she buay tahan the way i keep suaning her during our last conversation on MSN until she have to do all this. Eh seriously biatch, if u have to do all this to avoid me, u're not worth any of my time to torture. Theres no kick torturing some1 mentally when all she knows what to do is to avoid here and there. Such a weakling who doesnt know how to fight back.
Oh i forgot to mention in my earlier blog that i actually saw her when i was at shing siong after buying all the food. Wow u are so god damn lucky that the rest of them are not around, if not u confirm duno where to hide ur face. Eh biatch, if u're gonna avoid me and not let me torture u mentally anymore, i think i'll have to get u to speed up the paper process. If u're not going to do it fast, i'll just go approach any lawyer myself to get the papers done and u'll have to be paying for whatever costs the lawyer charges. I'll be giving u only up to this month end to do this shit, but if u let me continue to torture u mentally, i might change my mind and let u delay until ur bonus. Think about it biatch, and remember this, i'm not some1 who can be easily be toyed around with. Don't u dare mess with me.
Fun @ Aloha
Aloha~~~
Thats the place where the 3 days chalet was at. so damn big sia the place. It has 4 huge rooms with a toilet in every room. B4 we went to check in, des,kelly, louis, serene and me went to Shing Siong Bedok Interchange to get the BBQ stuffs. While they were choosing what prawns to buy, i went to look at the big container of frogs, then after a while when i was talking to louis, a frog jumped out of the container. I told louis abt it and his face suddenly changed and he quickly asks us to move on. LOL i bet he's afraid of the frog =.=.Humster. The initial thought of BBQ to me was like the usual barbequeing chicken wings, and stuffs like that. This time things were different, des told us he brought along a deep fryer!!!! Wah 1st time i go BBQ with a deep fryer, so this means we have more varieties of food liao.
Finally checked in at the chalet at around 4pm. Checked out the place for awhile then started to prepare for the food for the BBQ. At around 8+ the BBQ began. i didnt eat quite alot cos there were alot of ppl there but most of them were just waiting for food to be served to them while they gambled. Our usual grp who wasn't gambling were either helping out with the cooking or playing beatmania 2DX on the ps2. I eventually joined them playing after cooking for awhile. Henry Lijie and clarence came quite late cos they had a war going on in GE but awhile after they arrived, MJ session started. Once MJ started, i duno whats happening around in the chalet only except whats on the MJ table..... Overnight MJ how i missed it..... even lose money also happy sia. Played until the 2nd day of chalet around 11am+. By then alot of them were awake liao. Most of them was watching some old SBC Drama (Can u tell how old the drama was when i said SBC?). Then louis just said, wahh its so rare to see so many friends gather on a Monday morning to watch old dramas on tv....
After des and a few of them came back with breakfast, des brought out his remote control helicopter which his sis bought for him for his bday to play at the back yard. In less than 5 mins, the copter got stuck in the tree =.= thats when des's mood started to change liao. Once our MJ ended i went to give des some help, when i saw the copter i was thinking, how the hell are we suppose to get it down sia..... i ended up throwing the soccer ball up into the tree hoping to knock down the copter. Haha in this scenario, des cracked up a joke that even until now i cant stopped laughing. During this big hoo haa, an auntie working at the chalet walked pass and ask des what was happening, des told her something was stuck in the tree. so the auntie asked " 你的什么东西在上面? 重要吗?" and des replied her "我的飞机在上面!!". After hearing this all of us burst out laughing including the auntie. It just sounded soooo very wrong sia. It sounded like my dick is up there =.= We eventually had 3 items stuck in the tree, the copter, a small water bottle which was used during the 1st attempt to hit the copter down, and a soccer ball. All the 3 items were being retrieved after des went to get some professional help LOL.
On the 2nd nite after cutting the cake for both des and serene i went to rest awhile and i fell aslp for 1 hour. Woke up myself suddenly and automatically walked to the living hall to watch the last episode of the TCS drama at 9pm. After the show, i accompanied louis to send serene home cos he kept saying he needed some1 to be there on his way back to keep him awake while driving... nbz i also not enuff slp sia but bo bian if dowan to die young, i die die also must keep us awake during the journey. We went to pick up Jon on the way back to the chalet. While waiting for Jon at Pasir Ris MRT, louis and me went to get some "outside" food. Both of us got real sick of hotdog, kani(crabstick) and prawns. Both of us didnt eat much chicken wings on the 1st nite. We settled down with buying "kong bah pau" at white sands. Wow it tasted damn good, real worth the money. When we got back to the chalet, Henry was alrdy cooking the food. That was the 1st time i ate chicken wing at BBQ. i finished most of the chicken wings cos they were practically all "chao tah", my fav!!
Round 2 of our MJ session started after i finished the food, at this point of time, i'm alrdy very tired and wanted so badly to slp, but i played anyway if not they will have nothing to do cos louis said he wants to slp and nobody else plays MJ. MJ without louis was very peaceful, not much noise not much crap and i bet those slping had lots of peace unlike the MJ session on the 1st nite LOL. But playing MJ without louis like not much fun cos his crap are what makes us laugh. We played until around 7am+ and i decided that i have to stop, my vision by then was alrdy starting spinning around, if dont stop sure faint. Louis took over my seat and continued playing until its time to check out. As for me i went to take a shower and fell aslp on the sofa in the living hall. During this 3 days chalet, i've alrdy calculated the hours i slpt....approximately 4 hours in 36 hours.
When i got back home at 12pm in the afternoon, all i did was throw my stuffs at 1 corner of my room, switched on my pc, and fall aslp on my bed. slpt until 8.30 pm and got woken up by my mum to eat my dinner. Went back to slp again after the 9pm TCS new Drama. woke up at around 2am to blog this entry b4 i forget anything. I bet i'll be going to slp again soon.... cos my eyes alrdy half close by the time i type until here. Yah i think i'll go slp again now, cya .
P.S. Where got ppl go chalet play soccer 1? Where got ppl go chalet rollerblade 1? Bring shoe and my blades end up only put there for show cos i where got time for those??? LOL
Thats the place where the 3 days chalet was at. so damn big sia the place. It has 4 huge rooms with a toilet in every room. B4 we went to check in, des,kelly, louis, serene and me went to Shing Siong Bedok Interchange to get the BBQ stuffs. While they were choosing what prawns to buy, i went to look at the big container of frogs, then after a while when i was talking to louis, a frog jumped out of the container. I told louis abt it and his face suddenly changed and he quickly asks us to move on. LOL i bet he's afraid of the frog =.=.Humster. The initial thought of BBQ to me was like the usual barbequeing chicken wings, and stuffs like that. This time things were different, des told us he brought along a deep fryer!!!! Wah 1st time i go BBQ with a deep fryer, so this means we have more varieties of food liao.
Finally checked in at the chalet at around 4pm. Checked out the place for awhile then started to prepare for the food for the BBQ. At around 8+ the BBQ began. i didnt eat quite alot cos there were alot of ppl there but most of them were just waiting for food to be served to them while they gambled. Our usual grp who wasn't gambling were either helping out with the cooking or playing beatmania 2DX on the ps2. I eventually joined them playing after cooking for awhile. Henry Lijie and clarence came quite late cos they had a war going on in GE but awhile after they arrived, MJ session started. Once MJ started, i duno whats happening around in the chalet only except whats on the MJ table..... Overnight MJ how i missed it..... even lose money also happy sia. Played until the 2nd day of chalet around 11am+. By then alot of them were awake liao. Most of them was watching some old SBC Drama (Can u tell how old the drama was when i said SBC?). Then louis just said, wahh its so rare to see so many friends gather on a Monday morning to watch old dramas on tv....
After des and a few of them came back with breakfast, des brought out his remote control helicopter which his sis bought for him for his bday to play at the back yard. In less than 5 mins, the copter got stuck in the tree =.= thats when des's mood started to change liao. Once our MJ ended i went to give des some help, when i saw the copter i was thinking, how the hell are we suppose to get it down sia..... i ended up throwing the soccer ball up into the tree hoping to knock down the copter. Haha in this scenario, des cracked up a joke that even until now i cant stopped laughing. During this big hoo haa, an auntie working at the chalet walked pass and ask des what was happening, des told her something was stuck in the tree. so the auntie asked " 你的什么东西在上面? 重要吗?" and des replied her "我的飞机在上面!!". After hearing this all of us burst out laughing including the auntie. It just sounded soooo very wrong sia. It sounded like my dick is up there =.= We eventually had 3 items stuck in the tree, the copter, a small water bottle which was used during the 1st attempt to hit the copter down, and a soccer ball. All the 3 items were being retrieved after des went to get some professional help LOL.
On the 2nd nite after cutting the cake for both des and serene i went to rest awhile and i fell aslp for 1 hour. Woke up myself suddenly and automatically walked to the living hall to watch the last episode of the TCS drama at 9pm. After the show, i accompanied louis to send serene home cos he kept saying he needed some1 to be there on his way back to keep him awake while driving... nbz i also not enuff slp sia but bo bian if dowan to die young, i die die also must keep us awake during the journey. We went to pick up Jon on the way back to the chalet. While waiting for Jon at Pasir Ris MRT, louis and me went to get some "outside" food. Both of us got real sick of hotdog, kani(crabstick) and prawns. Both of us didnt eat much chicken wings on the 1st nite. We settled down with buying "kong bah pau" at white sands. Wow it tasted damn good, real worth the money. When we got back to the chalet, Henry was alrdy cooking the food. That was the 1st time i ate chicken wing at BBQ. i finished most of the chicken wings cos they were practically all "chao tah", my fav!!
Round 2 of our MJ session started after i finished the food, at this point of time, i'm alrdy very tired and wanted so badly to slp, but i played anyway if not they will have nothing to do cos louis said he wants to slp and nobody else plays MJ. MJ without louis was very peaceful, not much noise not much crap and i bet those slping had lots of peace unlike the MJ session on the 1st nite LOL. But playing MJ without louis like not much fun cos his crap are what makes us laugh. We played until around 7am+ and i decided that i have to stop, my vision by then was alrdy starting spinning around, if dont stop sure faint. Louis took over my seat and continued playing until its time to check out. As for me i went to take a shower and fell aslp on the sofa in the living hall. During this 3 days chalet, i've alrdy calculated the hours i slpt....approximately 4 hours in 36 hours.
When i got back home at 12pm in the afternoon, all i did was throw my stuffs at 1 corner of my room, switched on my pc, and fall aslp on my bed. slpt until 8.30 pm and got woken up by my mum to eat my dinner. Went back to slp again after the 9pm TCS new Drama. woke up at around 2am to blog this entry b4 i forget anything. I bet i'll be going to slp again soon.... cos my eyes alrdy half close by the time i type until here. Yah i think i'll go slp again now, cya .
P.S. Where got ppl go chalet play soccer 1? Where got ppl go chalet rollerblade 1? Bring shoe and my blades end up only put there for show cos i where got time for those??? LOL
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Been a long time.....
since i go orchard liao. Been hiding in my house for soo long until i feel so wierd taking the train. Well went out for a movie with ah gay and the usual gay grp, watched Mr Woodcock. Not as good as i expected actually. Not much laughter, myb its just becos of my mood ba. Duno y today go out so moody, i wonder what has gotten into me today. They were enjoying their jokes among themselves while i could only laugh at certain of their jokes while the rest of the time my mind was wondering around somewhere out there. I didnt notice this until ah gay asked me how come i look so dulan. Kinda wierd cos i wasnt dulan at all, i just didnt know y i dont have any mood to do anything.
Weiwei as usual was busy with girls until he come late for the show, not surprising to us but he got a big nagging session from me and david after the show, hmmm more of a making fun of him session ba. Anyway its good to know he has found a new target.
Tmr is going to be chalet with des and the rest of the east boys, suddenly i somehow felt the whole PS grp is splitting apart. We all have gotten into smaller grps, as for me, well i'm not being outcasted in any of these 2 grps but its really difficult sometimes when i'm with 1 grp and some1 from the other calls up and ask me where i am. I think the best thing to now is to let mature takes its course ba. I really hope someday the 2 grp will somehow or rather be like the old times.
I can feel david today isnt really enjoying himself much, cos he doesnt talk much, myb becos he's sick ba, or myb becos all their conversation was abt gaming. Anyway gonna go pack some stuffs for the chalet tmr now, wun be blogging for 3 days. Cya all 3 days later when i'm back.
Ciao~~
Weiwei as usual was busy with girls until he come late for the show, not surprising to us but he got a big nagging session from me and david after the show, hmmm more of a making fun of him session ba. Anyway its good to know he has found a new target.
Tmr is going to be chalet with des and the rest of the east boys, suddenly i somehow felt the whole PS grp is splitting apart. We all have gotten into smaller grps, as for me, well i'm not being outcasted in any of these 2 grps but its really difficult sometimes when i'm with 1 grp and some1 from the other calls up and ask me where i am. I think the best thing to now is to let mature takes its course ba. I really hope someday the 2 grp will somehow or rather be like the old times.
I can feel david today isnt really enjoying himself much, cos he doesnt talk much, myb becos he's sick ba, or myb becos all their conversation was abt gaming. Anyway gonna go pack some stuffs for the chalet tmr now, wun be blogging for 3 days. Cya all 3 days later when i'm back.
Ciao~~
Friday, October 12, 2007
Wee~~~ Nice songs
Just When i Needed You Most ---- Supposed to be an english song, then while seaching for 品冠 version of the this song, i stumbled across this version. Listen 1 time liked it immediately. Although 潘帅 version is in his 1st album 的 but still this version just brings out the livelier version for this song. Wana know what the lyrics are? Go search in the webby i update myself with new songs ba.
The next 4 songs are all in 张震岳 new album called OK.
小宇 --- I like this song cos the music very soothing. Lyrics kinda cute also.
OK --- This is his album's 主打歌. This song power la. Just shows exactly how i feel now. i specially liked 1 verse. It goes 我可不想装的很可悲 好让人家来给我安慰. I'm not like some ppl out there who act pitiful to win other ppl's wife's heart. This kind of man is a total disgrace to all men in the world. The song is more of a rap so not many ppl will like it but if u read the lyrics while listening to the song, this song is actually very meaningful.
路口 --- This song hmm duno how to say sia. Its how i felt initially when the incident happened. Supposed to be a sad song for those who have a bad relationship but then i hear until 1 part i burst out laughing. It goes 我不想在走 去你妈的 路口... get it? LOL
就让这首歌 --- This song quite cute, half singing half rapping. Singing is done by 张震岳 and the rapping is done by 2 ppl. 1st part is by MC Hotdog ( His rap damn power ) , the 2nd part is done by Jay's ex gf 侯佩岑. I liked the part that MC rapped especially this part 电影散场之后 你是否留下什么 一切不难再重头 那感伤对画面说 这决定变得轻松 .
Well the last song in the list is my all time fav song lor. Chio bu sing 1.
Overall 张震岳 new album i find it kinda good. I don't usually listen to his songs previously but then this album really has lots of good songs. Shld be worth the money to buy.
The next 4 songs are all in 张震岳 new album called OK.
小宇 --- I like this song cos the music very soothing. Lyrics kinda cute also.
OK --- This is his album's 主打歌. This song power la. Just shows exactly how i feel now. i specially liked 1 verse. It goes 我可不想装的很可悲 好让人家来给我安慰. I'm not like some ppl out there who act pitiful to win other ppl's wife's heart. This kind of man is a total disgrace to all men in the world. The song is more of a rap so not many ppl will like it but if u read the lyrics while listening to the song, this song is actually very meaningful.
路口 --- This song hmm duno how to say sia. Its how i felt initially when the incident happened. Supposed to be a sad song for those who have a bad relationship but then i hear until 1 part i burst out laughing. It goes 我不想在走 去你妈的 路口... get it? LOL
就让这首歌 --- This song quite cute, half singing half rapping. Singing is done by 张震岳 and the rapping is done by 2 ppl. 1st part is by MC Hotdog ( His rap damn power ) , the 2nd part is done by Jay's ex gf 侯佩岑. I liked the part that MC rapped especially this part 电影散场之后 你是否留下什么 一切不难再重头 那感伤对画面说 这决定变得轻松 .
Well the last song in the list is my all time fav song lor. Chio bu sing 1.
Overall 张震岳 new album i find it kinda good. I don't usually listen to his songs previously but then this album really has lots of good songs. Shld be worth the money to buy.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
Good day, Good Lunch, Good Luck
Today seems to be a good day for me, duno y i woke up feeling happy, even though i slept for only less than 5 hours. Was chatting on the fone until 6.30 am this morning and woke up at 11+am then went back to slp until 1.30pm lol. When i woke up, my mind seemed so clear and empty, i couldnt find anything that will piss me off. I was shocked!!! After so long i was finally able to get myself pissed off early in the morning by thinking of the hurt she has caused in me.
Had a good lunch today too. The food at the usual Economic rice stall tasted exceptionally good today. Everything on my plate was so tasty, even the rice tasted sweet. Met up David and Fel at tpy for lunch. Actually last nite when i asked david to come for lunch i alrdy told him its ok if he wants to ask Fel along cos she's also working nearby. I'm not the kind of person who hates ppl when they have done nothing wrong to me. But i told david that if she actually dun really feel like seeing me i'm fine with it too, at most we meet some other time for lunch lor, not as if today my last day on earth =p.
As usual those 2 jokers keep suaning each other while eating lor. Sometimes i wonder, they really make a good pair LOL JK NIA. That Fel hor i seriously BTH her, Pls do not tell ppl u working at TPY next time hor, u shld know y la hor =p. Anyway after lunch and some talk kok sessions, david and i went to pa billiard at TPY, and as usual i lose to him lor. Dun feel sian when i lost him cos its normal. He too power liao la. Actually wanted to walk with him to the interchange after we finish our game 1, but my tummy 不听话, need to go do 大号, so bo bian lor i have to faster go home. Finish updating this have to go do assignment liao, haiz how i wish i could slack down abit now but canot sia, Sunday is Desmond and Serene's Bday, have to think of what present to get for them liao. haiyo really headache. I bet Sunday's chalet will be full of laughters. With Henry and Louis around, its hard not to laugh. Looking forward to it man. Still got 2 more days =.= impatient !!!!!!!!
I also wana wish myself good luck in handling my new found personality, i had some quiet time thinking last nite, and my actions really scares me. Even previously i used to hate lots of things, i would only merely pass some bad comments and stop. I would never think of doing or saying nasty things in front of them cos i didnt want the person to look or feel embarressed in front of so many ppl. But now i really changed into another person, my words have became my weapon, i would say the nastiest things to hurt her yet not feeling any guilt at all. Is this the real me? On the other hand when i did that i felt kinda good, i felt happy, i never felt this good in my life b4.
I kept asking myself, do i really need to see a person suffer then i can be happy? The word yes keep appearing b4 me when i asked myself that. So i guess thats it, i'm being possessed by the Devil. Since this is my fate, I'll accept it. Since this is what i have to do to be happy, i shall not let myself down. The only time i will ever shed another tear will be the day my mother pass away.
It could be possible that even if i'm being shot in the heart i believe the bullet will not penetrate it, cos its all hardened up now. Nothing in the whole world will be able to open it again. Want me to open up my heart? I'll teach u how. Just show me your own heart 1st, dig it out and show me if its black or red. Or u dont even have 1 to show in the 1st place. Only then i'll believe u that u're not lying to me and only then i'll start to trust u.
( Dont so BHB this sentence is not for U, this sentence is for other strangers whom just in case have a chance to step into my life in future. Nothing in this entry is written for u).
Ok assignment time. cya
Had a good lunch today too. The food at the usual Economic rice stall tasted exceptionally good today. Everything on my plate was so tasty, even the rice tasted sweet. Met up David and Fel at tpy for lunch. Actually last nite when i asked david to come for lunch i alrdy told him its ok if he wants to ask Fel along cos she's also working nearby. I'm not the kind of person who hates ppl when they have done nothing wrong to me. But i told david that if she actually dun really feel like seeing me i'm fine with it too, at most we meet some other time for lunch lor, not as if today my last day on earth =p.
As usual those 2 jokers keep suaning each other while eating lor. Sometimes i wonder, they really make a good pair LOL JK NIA. That Fel hor i seriously BTH her, Pls do not tell ppl u working at TPY next time hor, u shld know y la hor =p. Anyway after lunch and some talk kok sessions, david and i went to pa billiard at TPY, and as usual i lose to him lor. Dun feel sian when i lost him cos its normal. He too power liao la. Actually wanted to walk with him to the interchange after we finish our game 1, but my tummy 不听话, need to go do 大号, so bo bian lor i have to faster go home. Finish updating this have to go do assignment liao, haiz how i wish i could slack down abit now but canot sia, Sunday is Desmond and Serene's Bday, have to think of what present to get for them liao. haiyo really headache. I bet Sunday's chalet will be full of laughters. With Henry and Louis around, its hard not to laugh. Looking forward to it man. Still got 2 more days =.= impatient !!!!!!!!
I also wana wish myself good luck in handling my new found personality, i had some quiet time thinking last nite, and my actions really scares me. Even previously i used to hate lots of things, i would only merely pass some bad comments and stop. I would never think of doing or saying nasty things in front of them cos i didnt want the person to look or feel embarressed in front of so many ppl. But now i really changed into another person, my words have became my weapon, i would say the nastiest things to hurt her yet not feeling any guilt at all. Is this the real me? On the other hand when i did that i felt kinda good, i felt happy, i never felt this good in my life b4.
I kept asking myself, do i really need to see a person suffer then i can be happy? The word yes keep appearing b4 me when i asked myself that. So i guess thats it, i'm being possessed by the Devil. Since this is my fate, I'll accept it. Since this is what i have to do to be happy, i shall not let myself down. The only time i will ever shed another tear will be the day my mother pass away.
It could be possible that even if i'm being shot in the heart i believe the bullet will not penetrate it, cos its all hardened up now. Nothing in the whole world will be able to open it again. Want me to open up my heart? I'll teach u how. Just show me your own heart 1st, dig it out and show me if its black or red. Or u dont even have 1 to show in the 1st place. Only then i'll believe u that u're not lying to me and only then i'll start to trust u.
( Dont so BHB this sentence is not for U, this sentence is for other strangers whom just in case have a chance to step into my life in future. Nothing in this entry is written for u).
Ok assignment time. cya
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Yes I'm beginning to love my new found personality
What a great start with my new found personality. I finally realised Y so many ppl choose to hurt other ppl. Its really fun and enjoyable to know that certain things that u have said will cause hurt to another person.
I've taken my 1st step out, so theres no turning back now. Well she just told me the god damned biggest joke i ever heard. She said she go clubbing and drinking becos of me!!! LOL I never did encourage her to club or to drink and she says shes doing all those tihng bcos of me.. lol i couldnt stop laffing at this. Since she had wanted so badly to get away from me, why would she be doing all those? Prolly its due to being too happy so she had to drink and go club so she can flirt with more guys. Yesterday she drink until throw up leh... LOL pathetic! how i wished i was there to mock at her. but doesnt make a difference since she told me she threw up. but i'm not satisfied with only just that. Its not enuff to make me happy to cover up the emotional torture she have given me. NO nothing will be enuff. She told me to give her a call just now to quarrel , and i told her no cos i didnt want my ears to bleed LOL. I cant believe these words actually came out from me hahaha. She even threatened that i'll never hear her voice from now on again. She starts to assume again that i wanted her to die.... wah she really canot change sia. Who said i wanted her to die? I want her to carry on living, and living in misery. I hope she can live a super long life setting the guiness world record for the longest living human being on earth. This way she will be able to see all her friends and family die 1 by 1 in front of her. She better not die so fast. Death will not satisfy me. I want her to live her life in such misery that she cant even take her own life even if she wanted to. Seriously i hope some guy gets her pregnant now and break off with her not wanting to take any responsibilities. Can some1 do me this favour and hurt her this way? then when she's going to give birth the baby dies while in the delivery room. Ohhh she'll be so shattered and hurt. Myb even cry until eyes blind. Hahaha. I wish somebody wil just treat her the same way she played with me. Come on guys buck up abit, she's an easy fish to catch, all u need to have is money. She loves money. Just do me a favour and go hurt her.
I remembered her asking me this " u think in the past 3 yrs i've nvr loved u b4?". Well my answer to u is YES U NVR DID. All these while ur mind was with chatting with guys in msn and getting to know more guys. Even when u r with me, ur mind will be thinking abt other guys. I dont trust women now. They're such fakes. No wonder they need to wear make up. its to cover their ugly side. Oh Devil can u make this biatch suffer but pls do not take her life away so soon. Death is letting her off too easily. Pls grant me this wish.
She said she'll get the papers rdy asap and when i asked when, she said when she gets her bonus. LOL u guys know when her bonus is? May next yr leh. Which means i have 7 more months to enjoy myself. Watch ur step, 1 wrong move from u, i can make sure u'll regret it for ur whole miserable life.
i have to really apologise to my frd David over here cos during the conversation, i somehow dragged u into the picture. Cos i heard from her that u have regained ur single status too, so i told her that myb she can even consider abt starting a r/s with ya. Well by saying this i'm actually trying to tell her what a slut she is, cos Mr Jimmy Hui was also out of r/s and thats when she become his listening ear and thats how they started. So given the fact that she's such a slut, she can be ur listening ear and myb hook u up. So sorry david. Listening ear my ass lol. That guy has so many frds so y does he have to approach u? This is a good method to steal other ppl's wife or gf. Guys out there must start learning. myb i shld get to know this shithead more and learn a few tricks from him so i can start going out there breaking other ppl's family up.
End of the day i can only tell myself. As long as she suffers, I'll be so damn happy.
I've taken my 1st step out, so theres no turning back now. Well she just told me the god damned biggest joke i ever heard. She said she go clubbing and drinking becos of me!!! LOL I never did encourage her to club or to drink and she says shes doing all those tihng bcos of me.. lol i couldnt stop laffing at this. Since she had wanted so badly to get away from me, why would she be doing all those? Prolly its due to being too happy so she had to drink and go club so she can flirt with more guys. Yesterday she drink until throw up leh... LOL pathetic! how i wished i was there to mock at her. but doesnt make a difference since she told me she threw up. but i'm not satisfied with only just that. Its not enuff to make me happy to cover up the emotional torture she have given me. NO nothing will be enuff. She told me to give her a call just now to quarrel , and i told her no cos i didnt want my ears to bleed LOL. I cant believe these words actually came out from me hahaha. She even threatened that i'll never hear her voice from now on again. She starts to assume again that i wanted her to die.... wah she really canot change sia. Who said i wanted her to die? I want her to carry on living, and living in misery. I hope she can live a super long life setting the guiness world record for the longest living human being on earth. This way she will be able to see all her friends and family die 1 by 1 in front of her. She better not die so fast. Death will not satisfy me. I want her to live her life in such misery that she cant even take her own life even if she wanted to. Seriously i hope some guy gets her pregnant now and break off with her not wanting to take any responsibilities. Can some1 do me this favour and hurt her this way? then when she's going to give birth the baby dies while in the delivery room. Ohhh she'll be so shattered and hurt. Myb even cry until eyes blind. Hahaha. I wish somebody wil just treat her the same way she played with me. Come on guys buck up abit, she's an easy fish to catch, all u need to have is money. She loves money. Just do me a favour and go hurt her.
I remembered her asking me this " u think in the past 3 yrs i've nvr loved u b4?". Well my answer to u is YES U NVR DID. All these while ur mind was with chatting with guys in msn and getting to know more guys. Even when u r with me, ur mind will be thinking abt other guys. I dont trust women now. They're such fakes. No wonder they need to wear make up. its to cover their ugly side. Oh Devil can u make this biatch suffer but pls do not take her life away so soon. Death is letting her off too easily. Pls grant me this wish.
She said she'll get the papers rdy asap and when i asked when, she said when she gets her bonus. LOL u guys know when her bonus is? May next yr leh. Which means i have 7 more months to enjoy myself. Watch ur step, 1 wrong move from u, i can make sure u'll regret it for ur whole miserable life.
i have to really apologise to my frd David over here cos during the conversation, i somehow dragged u into the picture. Cos i heard from her that u have regained ur single status too, so i told her that myb she can even consider abt starting a r/s with ya. Well by saying this i'm actually trying to tell her what a slut she is, cos Mr Jimmy Hui was also out of r/s and thats when she become his listening ear and thats how they started. So given the fact that she's such a slut, she can be ur listening ear and myb hook u up. So sorry david. Listening ear my ass lol. That guy has so many frds so y does he have to approach u? This is a good method to steal other ppl's wife or gf. Guys out there must start learning. myb i shld get to know this shithead more and learn a few tricks from him so i can start going out there breaking other ppl's family up.
End of the day i can only tell myself. As long as she suffers, I'll be so damn happy.
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Somehow i think i have 6th sense... is the Devil really on my side?
Made a call to her to check if she has found any lawyers to prepare our papers, and like i've predicted she's still ourside. See i know even without internet, she'll still have ways to entertain herself. Told her to go check HoH cos a frd told me the prices there are much cheaper and also told her to do it asap. I really feel the devil in me slowly emerging, it felt kinda good to be a bad guy. I dun have to think of any1's feelings and just do whatever i like. Whats the point of thinking so much when they dun appreciate it when u consider abt their feelings? No1 ever considered abt my feelings apart from my mum. No1 ever know how i felt during these time, how much i've endured, how many sleepless nites, how much falling down and picking myself back up again.All they know is to point their fingers at me even when i've done nth wrong. Since these ppl see me as this way, i might as well be they way they see me as. At least this will make me feel better cos i really am like that.
She says i've broken my promise again to help, then so be it, whats so great abt breaking 1 more promise? I'll break it. She says i'm being lazy again after we split up whereby i'm trying to work hard, well so be it i'll be lazy like what she said. Since whatever things that i do are wrong, then i might as well keep doing things that are wrong.She said the reason for me trying to win her back is becos i wanted revenge, well if thats how she sees it as then i shall do it, but i'm not going to win her heart back, i'm gonna take revengeby not laying a finger finger on her. No reason out there for me to be a good guy anymore. I've just had a taste of being a bad guy and i kinda enjoyed it. During the past 3 yrs, she knows i cant open up my heart fully to another girl due to my previous relationship. Yes she gave me hopes, she assured me over and over again that she'll not be like that. And when i finally opened up my heart fully to her, she deceived me, she betrayed me, she's toying with me. Now she says that i'm trying to get back together with her again cos i wanted revenge. If thats the way she sees me, then thats the way i shall do it, BUT i'll nvr go back to her side to take my revenge. I'll have my revenge without even laying a single finger on her. I'm gonna enjoy every single moment of this. No wonder ppl always say revenge is sweet. Now i know, it really is very sweet. Well I'm gonna just do all these things as not to let u down on how u see me as. U are so very true that i'm still lazy, i like to break my promise, and yes i wanted revenge on u allllllll this time. i dun even give a damn how ur frd thinks i am, what r they? they're nth but a bunch of animals who teaches u to betray ur husband. They're nth but lowlives animals who thinks highly of themselves but are actually a piece of shit in reality. Oh btw, u better stop going for so much supper or drinking or eating too much. cos u'll soon grow fat and when u're fat, u'll start to lose ur queue of guys who wana flirt with u, and eventually u'll have no more attention from guys. In the meantime, myb u can get 1 of those guys in ur queue to pay for ur internet bills 1st. Just open ur mouth, believe me, they'll fork out the money in less that a day to help u. U dun even have to pay them back, cos to a guy who wants to go after u, that little amount of money they still can treat it as investment for a good time. Am i hurting u with what i've just said??? AWWWWW too bad, cos thats how u show me of what kind of a person u really are. AWWWW dont even shed a tear now, those tears mean nth to me, crocodile tears......... U wana know how hard my heart is now? Remove the head of the BIG hammer at ur house, get 1 of ur guy "friend" to throw throw it on the floor of the coridor outside ur house with all his strength. Thats how hard my heart is now.
Pray to God to give u courage to die? i'd rather submit myself to the Devil and make other ppl suffer more than i do. Not many ppl see eye to eye with my doings, but i dun care, its my business so y shld u even bother? I LOVE MY LIFE NOW. So much hatred... everything in me is HATE, ANGER, REVENGE. I'm only happy when i see ppl suffer now. U want me to be happy? Then make sure u suffer. U want to battle me in this emotional duel? Then live a better life and let me know, i'll feel devasted if i know u're not suffering enough. I'll make sure u remember me for the rest of ur life in the bad ways and not the good ways.
Ppl say "If u are good in ur life, u go to heaven when u die, but if u're bad u go to hell."
I think i rather go to hell than going to heaven. Have u ever heard of smoking and drinking in heaven? Have u ever heard of strip clubs in heaven? Have u ever heard of sex in heaven? Of cos not, they are all too goody 2 shoes to even do all this. SO called have to be upright and behold justice, MY ASS. Hell isnt that bad, at least everything thats illegal here or considered a bad thing to do while being alive, u get them in hell. Y make myself suffer in heaven? Aint it better to enjoy my afterlife?
She says i've broken my promise again to help, then so be it, whats so great abt breaking 1 more promise? I'll break it. She says i'm being lazy again after we split up whereby i'm trying to work hard, well so be it i'll be lazy like what she said. Since whatever things that i do are wrong, then i might as well keep doing things that are wrong.She said the reason for me trying to win her back is becos i wanted revenge, well if thats how she sees it as then i shall do it, but i'm not going to win her heart back, i'm gonna take revengeby not laying a finger finger on her. No reason out there for me to be a good guy anymore. I've just had a taste of being a bad guy and i kinda enjoyed it. During the past 3 yrs, she knows i cant open up my heart fully to another girl due to my previous relationship. Yes she gave me hopes, she assured me over and over again that she'll not be like that. And when i finally opened up my heart fully to her, she deceived me, she betrayed me, she's toying with me. Now she says that i'm trying to get back together with her again cos i wanted revenge. If thats the way she sees me, then thats the way i shall do it, BUT i'll nvr go back to her side to take my revenge. I'll have my revenge without even laying a single finger on her. I'm gonna enjoy every single moment of this. No wonder ppl always say revenge is sweet. Now i know, it really is very sweet. Well I'm gonna just do all these things as not to let u down on how u see me as. U are so very true that i'm still lazy, i like to break my promise, and yes i wanted revenge on u allllllll this time. i dun even give a damn how ur frd thinks i am, what r they? they're nth but a bunch of animals who teaches u to betray ur husband. They're nth but lowlives animals who thinks highly of themselves but are actually a piece of shit in reality. Oh btw, u better stop going for so much supper or drinking or eating too much. cos u'll soon grow fat and when u're fat, u'll start to lose ur queue of guys who wana flirt with u, and eventually u'll have no more attention from guys. In the meantime, myb u can get 1 of those guys in ur queue to pay for ur internet bills 1st. Just open ur mouth, believe me, they'll fork out the money in less that a day to help u. U dun even have to pay them back, cos to a guy who wants to go after u, that little amount of money they still can treat it as investment for a good time. Am i hurting u with what i've just said??? AWWWWW too bad, cos thats how u show me of what kind of a person u really are. AWWWW dont even shed a tear now, those tears mean nth to me, crocodile tears......... U wana know how hard my heart is now? Remove the head of the BIG hammer at ur house, get 1 of ur guy "friend" to throw throw it on the floor of the coridor outside ur house with all his strength. Thats how hard my heart is now.
Pray to God to give u courage to die? i'd rather submit myself to the Devil and make other ppl suffer more than i do. Not many ppl see eye to eye with my doings, but i dun care, its my business so y shld u even bother? I LOVE MY LIFE NOW. So much hatred... everything in me is HATE, ANGER, REVENGE. I'm only happy when i see ppl suffer now. U want me to be happy? Then make sure u suffer. U want to battle me in this emotional duel? Then live a better life and let me know, i'll feel devasted if i know u're not suffering enough. I'll make sure u remember me for the rest of ur life in the bad ways and not the good ways.
Ppl say "If u are good in ur life, u go to heaven when u die, but if u're bad u go to hell."
I think i rather go to hell than going to heaven. Have u ever heard of smoking and drinking in heaven? Have u ever heard of strip clubs in heaven? Have u ever heard of sex in heaven? Of cos not, they are all too goody 2 shoes to even do all this. SO called have to be upright and behold justice, MY ASS. Hell isnt that bad, at least everything thats illegal here or considered a bad thing to do while being alive, u get them in hell. Y make myself suffer in heaven? Aint it better to enjoy my afterlife?
Monday, October 8, 2007
Relieved? Released? or just Remorse?
Received a call from her this afternoon, at 1st i couldnt reco her voice mistaking it for xue. She was talking softly and patiently to me over the fone, but somehow i just couldnt control my anger when i hear her voice. Scenes of being accused and betrayed started floating back to my memories again. I was really burning inside. Although i was woken up from my slp by her, i could remember clearly what i told her over the fone. I really mean it when i said those words. I'm just too hurt to deceive myself anymore. Despite trying to pick myself up again trying to win her back, she, again shattered my hopes by accusing me. I've been totally beaten up by her. Today was the day i really couldnt take it anymore, i spoke up my feelings abt how she have hurt me, i told her how much i hated her after the accusation made by her, after that i fell back to slp with a few drop of tears in my eyes. Soon after i woke up feeling lighter... No not my weight of cos, but its my heart that felt lighter. somehow i think by keeping all those words to myself have made me depressed for so long. I somehow felt i was released from her torture chamber. Then on the other hand i was in dillema, have i spoken too harsh to her when she was trying to be nice to me?
When she told me that her house internet was cut off, the 1st thing that actually came to my mind was..."So what? u sure have ur ways to entertain urself... so many guys are waiting to date u, u can afford to change a different guy everyday for at least a month.And i believe those guys will be so willing to pay for whatever the expenses for the day" My gosh, in my mind is she really such a slut? Or do i actually think of all women this way? Such confusions, what has turned me into such monster? But end of the day, i'm still me. Whatever problems u have, it doesnt concerns me, so dont ever make ur problems mine. ( this phrase goes out to everybody not just to u so dont u start ASSUMING that its for u only)
Rushing assignment for the whole day today, no time to log in PW to rush my last 2 lvls. Thought that assignment can finish fast but ended up after reading its contents i found out its going to be a long day for me. Called gary up and asked him to lvl for me 1st but he also rushing his own charecter.. then left 1 person to call liao. When i called her, she was still slping. LOL her voice still so sexy when she just woke up LOLOLOLOLOL. Thats how we always disturb her =p
This person is none other than xiaoxue lor. Ask her to help me lvl a few % for me b4 i can log in again. I believe she wun dua me ba. No matter what also soo long frd liao, at least got 10% i also happy.
Now at the present moment i'm updating this, i felt much relieved and less depressed cos i know when somethings are meant to be ended, it has to end. I've got to stop deceiving myself.
对方是谁， 应该很帅， 我有点累， 祝福你有他陪。。。
When she told me that her house internet was cut off, the 1st thing that actually came to my mind was..."So what? u sure have ur ways to entertain urself... so many guys are waiting to date u, u can afford to change a different guy everyday for at least a month.And i believe those guys will be so willing to pay for whatever the expenses for the day" My gosh, in my mind is she really such a slut? Or do i actually think of all women this way? Such confusions, what has turned me into such monster? But end of the day, i'm still me. Whatever problems u have, it doesnt concerns me, so dont ever make ur problems mine. ( this phrase goes out to everybody not just to u so dont u start ASSUMING that its for u only)
Rushing assignment for the whole day today, no time to log in PW to rush my last 2 lvls. Thought that assignment can finish fast but ended up after reading its contents i found out its going to be a long day for me. Called gary up and asked him to lvl for me 1st but he also rushing his own charecter.. then left 1 person to call liao. When i called her, she was still slping. LOL her voice still so sexy when she just woke up LOLOLOLOLOL. Thats how we always disturb her =p
This person is none other than xiaoxue lor. Ask her to help me lvl a few % for me b4 i can log in again. I believe she wun dua me ba. No matter what also soo long frd liao, at least got 10% i also happy.
Now at the present moment i'm updating this, i felt much relieved and less depressed cos i know when somethings are meant to be ended, it has to end. I've got to stop deceiving myself.
对方是谁， 应该很帅， 我有点累， 祝福你有他陪。。。
Love turned hate........
Yea WTF is all i can say now. Work so hard for fcuk? End up still kena accuse of breaking my promise. Everything turned out to be shit just becos ppl cant get me on my mobile. I DID tell her if she cant get me on mobile she can call my house =.= which she have. Well myb my number is just not worth remembering.
After reading her blog today really saddens me. As usual i'm being accused over and over again. Said that i blocked her on msn, dont reply smses blah blah blah. Whereby my house fone is always there for her to contact me. Is it even wrong if some1 is too busy to even log in msn for a long period of time? Is it wrong that a person doesnt have enuff cash to top up his M card value? i did not top up my M card cos i think its pretty useless cos ppl can actually contact me via my house fone. and also i'm so used to going without a fone ( not like somebody else who cant live with her fone with all the guys number inside for her flirt). I have my own debts like i told her. I've got to settle my piling debts for over 3 yrs 1st, i've also told her. Now i'm being shot again by her saying that i'm just going back to my old ways not keeping my promise.. Life is so unfair.
Women always get things their way whereby men are always at the losing end. Other ppl always tend to side the women rather than the men. Y are human beings so blind?
I believe no1 like to be accused. but me? so what if i dont like it? i've been accused over and over again for the past yrs... and i have to quietly swollow them down. Life sux and so do u. Never get to the bottom of things and start assuming. Love turned hate, theres nothing more in me other than hate. the hatred for women, the hatred for life, the hatred for love. I wonder who was the 1 who blocked me from her msn in the 1st place... i went in msn today and tried to msg her yet in the end i got a pop up msg asking for her email address... lol what a joke. block u? i think its more like u block me out instead. Well i think it could be she's with some other guy in the room and trying to prove to him him that she will not flirt around anymore. Well bullshit. A leopard will nr change its spots. U do it once , u do it twice.
After reading her blog today really saddens me. As usual i'm being accused over and over again. Said that i blocked her on msn, dont reply smses blah blah blah. Whereby my house fone is always there for her to contact me. Is it even wrong if some1 is too busy to even log in msn for a long period of time? Is it wrong that a person doesnt have enuff cash to top up his M card value? i did not top up my M card cos i think its pretty useless cos ppl can actually contact me via my house fone. and also i'm so used to going without a fone ( not like somebody else who cant live with her fone with all the guys number inside for her flirt). I have my own debts like i told her. I've got to settle my piling debts for over 3 yrs 1st, i've also told her. Now i'm being shot again by her saying that i'm just going back to my old ways not keeping my promise.. Life is so unfair.
Women always get things their way whereby men are always at the losing end. Other ppl always tend to side the women rather than the men. Y are human beings so blind?
I believe no1 like to be accused. but me? so what if i dont like it? i've been accused over and over again for the past yrs... and i have to quietly swollow them down. Life sux and so do u. Never get to the bottom of things and start assuming. Love turned hate, theres nothing more in me other than hate. the hatred for women, the hatred for life, the hatred for love. I wonder who was the 1 who blocked me from her msn in the 1st place... i went in msn today and tried to msg her yet in the end i got a pop up msg asking for her email address... lol what a joke. block u? i think its more like u block me out instead. Well i think it could be she's with some other guy in the room and trying to prove to him him that she will not flirt around anymore. Well bullshit. A leopard will nr change its spots. U do it once , u do it twice.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
Leave me alone~~~
How i really hope all these nitemares will leave me alone for good. For the past 1 week I've not been slping very well, partly its due to my gaming hours but also it was caused by constant nitemares. Been having repeated nitemares of the same scenerio but only at different places. Am i gonna just fall to these nitemares and let it control me?
Somehow i found myself kinda sensitive to certain words that ppl say recently. Like today when gaming, our guild topic suddenly somehow i forgot how it started, landed on hotels. Some1 happened to mention Ritz, and i just told them to stop the topic cos i hate these words. A few of my close friends know whats going on so they did eventually stopped. Felt like a spoilt sport at that moment and i somehow have to think of some other things to start up the guild talking again. Its already been so long and even such simple things like that i cant even let go. How is my life going to go on?
Been a long time since i had "Liang teh" and my mum specially went to the market early today to get some barley back to make barley water for me to drink. She keeps saying the weather is hot and she wants to drink it too, but i know she's making the whole pot for me. Why i said that? Well she poured the whole pot of barley into my personal use bottle and kept it in the fridge for me, and she even kept the wintermelons and put them in the fridge to chill them for me to eat as snack. How i missed this kind of motherly care. For the past 3 yrs, i don't feel like i'm being accepted as part of the family at all. I shld be somehow glad that i made this decision to leave that place. Mummy's boy? No of cos not. Only those ppl who have stayed alone overseas without ur family will know what kind of feeling this is that i'm experiencing right now. It something called Family love. My mum even offered to get dinner for me cos she knows i'm tired to go downstairs again to buy my own dinner. ( Was running errands today for my mum for the whole day). I only told her to get rice for me but she came back with extra desserts too. Thx mom. I love you.
Shall i try not slpin at all today so that i can get some slp without having any dreams tmr? Will this method work somehow? But i'm alrdy too tired to keep myself awake... its alrdy been a long time since i fell aslp on my keyboard, it just happened recently =.=/ Freaking lack of slp is killing me. How i wanted to slp early but i'm too afraid to have the same nitemare again. Now even gaming can't help me divert my attention and let me forget my unhappiness. I'm such a failure, i can't even find a suitable solution for myself.... somebody pls tell me what to do??? I'm really at lost.
Somehow i found myself kinda sensitive to certain words that ppl say recently. Like today when gaming, our guild topic suddenly somehow i forgot how it started, landed on hotels. Some1 happened to mention Ritz, and i just told them to stop the topic cos i hate these words. A few of my close friends know whats going on so they did eventually stopped. Felt like a spoilt sport at that moment and i somehow have to think of some other things to start up the guild talking again. Its already been so long and even such simple things like that i cant even let go. How is my life going to go on?
Been a long time since i had "Liang teh" and my mum specially went to the market early today to get some barley back to make barley water for me to drink. She keeps saying the weather is hot and she wants to drink it too, but i know she's making the whole pot for me. Why i said that? Well she poured the whole pot of barley into my personal use bottle and kept it in the fridge for me, and she even kept the wintermelons and put them in the fridge to chill them for me to eat as snack. How i missed this kind of motherly care. For the past 3 yrs, i don't feel like i'm being accepted as part of the family at all. I shld be somehow glad that i made this decision to leave that place. Mummy's boy? No of cos not. Only those ppl who have stayed alone overseas without ur family will know what kind of feeling this is that i'm experiencing right now. It something called Family love. My mum even offered to get dinner for me cos she knows i'm tired to go downstairs again to buy my own dinner. ( Was running errands today for my mum for the whole day). I only told her to get rice for me but she came back with extra desserts too. Thx mom. I love you.
Shall i try not slpin at all today so that i can get some slp without having any dreams tmr? Will this method work somehow? But i'm alrdy too tired to keep myself awake... its alrdy been a long time since i fell aslp on my keyboard, it just happened recently =.=/ Freaking lack of slp is killing me. How i wanted to slp early but i'm too afraid to have the same nitemare again. Now even gaming can't help me divert my attention and let me forget my unhappiness. I'm such a failure, i can't even find a suitable solution for myself.... somebody pls tell me what to do??? I'm really at lost.
Friday, October 5, 2007
Dont know why but i just like this song
The singer was 15 when she sang this song i think, the song was in her debut album back in 2002. Very nice voice. The song rhythem kinda retro lol but funny thing is after listening to it once the music kept playing in my mind liao. Here's the lyrics
津亭 - 寂寞的味道
天色已晚已经黄昏又要分离
走在大街的你我
相互依偎 手牵着手
站在分手的街头
双手轻轻 整理你的衣领
对你如此的留恋
在双眼中 化成了泪滴
寂寞的味道 是夜里痴恋你的温柔
微苦的爱 微甜的吻
抚摸着自己
寂寞的味道 沉浸在思念的温柔
微酸的心 在漫长夜里 等待
Theres another song I've included. This is my all time favourite. Still remembered the 1st time i heard this song was at Jay's 1st concert in Singapore. She was the special guest star for that concert and also Jay's 师妹. The moment i heard this song i loved it immediately.She's also 1 of the more popular TCS actress now. Heres the lyrics...
芮恩--是谁
这场雪隔着橱窗了解
玻璃外面的你在另一个世界
这条街握着温热咖啡
想起有些事永远没办法解决
我用那轻描淡写
一笔一划的彩绘
形容感情上濒临的决裂还有心碎
问你对方是谁
你闭上嘴沉默以对
我眼睛泛着泪
对方是谁应该很美
我有点累祝福你有她陪
那绿叶不懂凋谢的季节
我却清楚你要分手前的差别
那夏夜不懂得满天风雪
我也不懂你说的永远是哪些
津亭 - 寂寞的味道
天色已晚已经黄昏又要分离
走在大街的你我
相互依偎 手牵着手
站在分手的街头
双手轻轻 整理你的衣领
对你如此的留恋
在双眼中 化成了泪滴
寂寞的味道 是夜里痴恋你的温柔
微苦的爱 微甜的吻
抚摸着自己
寂寞的味道 沉浸在思念的温柔
微酸的心 在漫长夜里 等待
Theres another song I've included. This is my all time favourite. Still remembered the 1st time i heard this song was at Jay's 1st concert in Singapore. She was the special guest star for that concert and also Jay's 师妹. The moment i heard this song i loved it immediately.She's also 1 of the more popular TCS actress now. Heres the lyrics...
芮恩--是谁
这场雪隔着橱窗了解
玻璃外面的你在另一个世界
这条街握着温热咖啡
想起有些事永远没办法解决
我用那轻描淡写
一笔一划的彩绘
形容感情上濒临的决裂还有心碎
问你对方是谁
你闭上嘴沉默以对
我眼睛泛着泪
对方是谁应该很美
我有点累祝福你有她陪
那绿叶不懂凋谢的季节
我却清楚你要分手前的差别
那夏夜不懂得满天风雪
我也不懂你说的永远是哪些
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Think i've seen this scene somewhere b4....
Extracted from someplace on the internet, written by somebody "mysterious"
"Imagine this, guys.When you are holding her today, and you cheat on her by hugging and kissing another gal.And then you run back to her.And u do the same.But you see love in her eyes.What do you think?Do you feel the hurt?Can you feel the guilt?"
Now, lets replace the words from guys to girls, from him to her, and from her to him, from he to she and she to he. Whats is it that u see? Thats the life i was living for the last week in the bedok flat together with her. Guilt or no guilt no1 knows. For all i know, she may be even lying to me that she felt guilty. I dont have x ray eyes to tell if some1 is lying or not but 1 thing i can be sure of is that i was indeed fooled by her for almost 4yrs.
Reading all these romance stuffs and watching all those those lovey dovey shows on tv or movies kinda makes me wana puke now. All those are nothing but bullshit. Do u really think if u stay true to some1, the other person will do the same? OMG stop being a fool like me. More women cheat on their other half as of compared to men. Dont believe me? Google it! the answers are all there for ya.
"Imagine this, guys.When you are holding her today, and you cheat on her by hugging and kissing another gal.And then you run back to her.And u do the same.But you see love in her eyes.What do you think?Do you feel the hurt?Can you feel the guilt?"
Now, lets replace the words from guys to girls, from him to her, and from her to him, from he to she and she to he. Whats is it that u see? Thats the life i was living for the last week in the bedok flat together with her. Guilt or no guilt no1 knows. For all i know, she may be even lying to me that she felt guilty. I dont have x ray eyes to tell if some1 is lying or not but 1 thing i can be sure of is that i was indeed fooled by her for almost 4yrs.
Reading all these romance stuffs and watching all those those lovey dovey shows on tv or movies kinda makes me wana puke now. All those are nothing but bullshit. Do u really think if u stay true to some1, the other person will do the same? OMG stop being a fool like me. More women cheat on their other half as of compared to men. Dont believe me? Google it! the answers are all there for ya.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Small small Singapore
Hmm i wonder if its pure coincidence or fate, this is the 2nd time i bumped into an old schoolmate of mine. 1st time was in IRC which was many yrs back, and this time it was in an online game. During these period of time we do bump into each other outside a few times, well the funny thing is everytime she gives me her mobile number i will save it in my fonebook but erase it when i'm home. Well i think this is a small little thing i always do when i'm attached ba. Anyway Don't get the wrong idea, this frd of mine is alrdy married, we're only purely frds.
Seriously duno y when i so wanted to see somebody i dont get to see them, but when this person is some1 i dont usually think of i get to see them... Fucking God is playing with my life. I guess tonite will be another miserable nite for me ba. How long more do i have to force myself to be happy instead of being really happy? 1 month? 1 yr? or my whole life? If there really was a God i would really go up to him and give him a piece of my mind. He's not doing such a good job and handling with us mortals. how many of us have suffered and he just sits back and relax enjoying our tragedy. Could he be a noob God who has just taken over the job? Whats the point of praying? whats the point of saying prayers? whats the whole damn point to believe in Hiim? I'd rather he take my life than to play me like a puppet right now. Back to rush lvl, i'm running out of time.
Fuck my life.
Seriously duno y when i so wanted to see somebody i dont get to see them, but when this person is some1 i dont usually think of i get to see them... Fucking God is playing with my life. I guess tonite will be another miserable nite for me ba. How long more do i have to force myself to be happy instead of being really happy? 1 month? 1 yr? or my whole life? If there really was a God i would really go up to him and give him a piece of my mind. He's not doing such a good job and handling with us mortals. how many of us have suffered and he just sits back and relax enjoying our tragedy. Could he be a noob God who has just taken over the job? Whats the point of praying? whats the point of saying prayers? whats the whole damn point to believe in Hiim? I'd rather he take my life than to play me like a puppet right now. Back to rush lvl, i'm running out of time.
Fuck my life.
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